In my twenties any meditation I did was part of my yoga practice at the time. I attended mass regularly and would pray when in a group that did but an actual “prayer life” was definitely not part of my repertoire. It took many years of recovering from the social justice ideas of “helping” and “survivor’s guilt” before I realized that asking for something through prayer was not a selfish behavior.
I have come to believe that prayer is about balance. In prayer I can clearly express that which I most desire. Simultaneously, I can completely trust God/Higher Power/ Universe that my intentions and desires will be heard and responded to, though not always in the ways I imagined.
When I got pregnant with our twins we had been saying lots of prayers around the idea of “lionhearted joy.” Our intention was a very strong, courageous, brave joy lacking all anxiety. We had a rather tumultuous pregnancy with a flood at our rental house, tax return identity theft, and a number of other weird life factors. All of these circumstances called for bravery, but didn’t feel particularly joyful. The twins were born with so much health and joy but 8 weeks early so it was in the month of the Leo/lion zodiac sign – lionhearted joy indeed. We aren’t always aware of the clarity in our intentions but God does deliver, perhaps not always in expected ways.
One thing I have definitely learned about prayer is to always use positive statements rather than negative/not statements. Always say the thing you want, rather than the thing you don’t want. Thus “lionhearted joy” rather than “Anxiety free joy.” Don’t include any word for something you do not want.
When we learned the twins were rare and had no barrier between them we tried to be very clear in our prayer for them. We spread the word to ask for “free flowing cords and equal sharing of resources.” The night they were born they had only 1 slight knot which apparently fell out gently and both weighed and measured the exact same 3lbs 10oz and 16.6 inches. Only free flowing cords and perfectly equal sharing of resources could give mono chorionic/mono amniotic twins that outcome.
This isn’t about miracles. This is about clarity and positivity. I am available to talk or message if you need any help clarifying or finding positive terminology for your prayers.
For meditation today:
- Find a comfortable position.
- Notice your breath. Begin to lengthen the exhales and inhales, engaging the diaphragm as previously taught.
- Ground and allow any part of you holding on to prayers of avoidance or fear melt away.
- Consider the petitions you hold in your heart. Connect with your higher power and express them slowly, one by one, using the clearest, most positive language you can.
- Notice whether your entire body can embrace each petition you make. Notice the difference in your body when you make these positive prayers than perhaps you had when you made a prayer in the “not” form with words of fear or avoidance.
- Take a few final breaths and make your way back out.